traveling light

As cliche as it may be - I like to think of life as a journey.  And in thinking this way I have learned not to focus so much on the destination, as how I travel to that destination.  From my last post, it is obvious that my hope is at the end of the journey I find home...but how do I go about the business of getting there?

Do i just hunker down and wait for the whole thing to be over?  I know a lot of people who have chosen this route.  Life is about tolerating, enduring, and getting by.  I don't want to just get by - I want to experience life - all the ups and downs that come with it.  

But there are so many things that weigh us down as we journey through life.  Baggage - both physical and emotional.  I am trying to minimize this baggage - both physical and emotional.  It means sorting through things - figuring out what to keep, what to leave, what to throw away, what not to own in the first place.  It's hard to travel light - it seems more natural to accumulate junk along the way then to leave it behind.

Physical baggage, while it seems harmless, can stop us dead in our tracks.  How many people do I know who purchased a home and now can't afford it and can't afford to get rid of it?  How many people have stuffed their closets so full that it's easier to leave them full than to sort through them?  How many people need to continually upgrade their space, their car, their pots and pans...the list goes on and on.  I fall victim to this all the time.  I want more - more stuff, better stuff, newer stuff.  

And stuff isn't bad - but it's dangerous if left unchecked.  It weighs us down - keeps us still - prevents us from continuing on in the journey.  I am trying to be more intentional about the physical baggage I bring into my life - do I really need it?  Why do I need it?  How long will I keep it for?  Who is telling me I need this?  I buy stuff - all the time - but do I know it's impact on my journey?

The hard baggage to shed is the emotional baggage.  The fears that get instilled in us early on in life.  The false identities we hide behind, because we are too afraid to really be who we are.  The sorrow that keeps us from risking again.  The pain that traps us in a moment.  The anger that we keep tucked away.

Sorting through emotional baggage is hard work - more often than not I would rather tackle the cluttered closet.  Emotional baggage is tricky - because we cannot shed all of it - but there is also a lot of it that we have fooled ourselves into keeping.  We think we are nothing if we are not the injured daughter, the over-looked wife, the under-appreciated husband, the son of an over-bearing father...the list goes on and on.  I think there is a difference between acknowledging something that is true and making it true about who we are.  I am constantly sorting through confusing emotional baggage - stories that I keep carrying around like a comfort blanket because at least I get how to see myself that way.  

But if I start shedding some of this emotional baggage, then I am not as weighed down - I can in many ways set out to discover who I am - who I will be.  To start new stories I have to make room for them - or else my life is too cluttered for them.  

I am trying to travel light - to be able to get up and go - to be able to say "Here I am, send me."  Perhaps this is what it means to carry home with you - like a bag on a stick - only the things that really matter can come - everything else has to be left behind.  I want to see life as an adventure - one I am always ready to jump into.  I don't want to get to a place where I say "I would love to go - but it's just too much work to bring all this baggage with me - perhaps next time."